please leave me silently

it's just christmas morning

so what do you feel -

waking with dreams

of a sharing

what seems, yet - what is real

alone in a nowhere - alone in a


i'm reaching for songs -

yet knowing -

a timeless sky holds my only


santa fled from the earth - so

long ago -

this i must know - as in writing


have i made it so -

oh! these tears of the years

falling eternal again,

is there ever - any warmth

against the snow of a when

well christmas, you've come

and died once again,

you're an analogy

unsung -

as a childhood scared to end

while trees are frozen

in ice, can anything

bend - there is still

pain in watching

my trees- they're but

breaking against the wind

it's you that i love - and

can not be near - it pains

me on christmas - though the

reasoning is clear

well good-bye christmas dream,

oh! again once again,

please leave me silently

for: i'm alone with a when.

- jude





a droplet of eternity, captured by


came singing a rhythm

and formed a rhyme

oh! that the ages must call you


a mother & child

into yourself you were


into a home - you were born again

and into now you are

a beginning,

birth out from birth out from birth,

into ...

into i, that i have,

met you, loved you

through the birth of your life ...

and it is here i lie, a no one but i -

watching your day

bare you into birth again,

with an only loveís care, i hear your


no, not that you are born into i,

but ; into

a you woman free

just to again, hear you splashing

within your eternity ...

- jude




morningís day ?

i woke -

a different day,

a different year,

with faces here

and there,

coming and going, just going


pictures of rhyme,

crowd the sky with words of


and i slip - to and fro,

through the dreams of a night

still asleep

a child's dance glows into me,

warm - a woman seemed eternally

to belong

and from the earth, there

is a song

who's words fade

back into sleep

whose time begins to

creep into a slowing stop

as i wake -

and now, in the

morning of another

year - gone,


i turn in bed,


cold and alone -

that dreams, are dreams

in eternal lonely screams

and in order to wake,

i must swallow the night

that another day, might


still free !

- jude




in tears of freedom

roads move against roads

is it memory?

but where am i reeling

through again -

tapping patterns, unsold


upon my window is the rain -

empty rooms and uncaught sands

came passing my time,

returning around -

yet, lonely rhymes

clear, before the rhythms

of the colors that are

and the rains that are a-tapping

will always come rapping

in tears of freedom ...

- jude




the solidity of evermore

star light,

star bright;

have i lost a star

superimposed upon its

own night

within the tonight

of our day -

woman, woman are you there

but where

wandering without you, i meet alone -

and in hearing you

now - i'm free to hear all

yea, the star is lost beyond the

sight -

as, in hearing all

anywhere falls prey to

the solidity of everywhere

- jude




just not allowed to cry

where becomes - when she says

good-bye - without giving

you - the words - that might

allow you

to cry -

must it always be

a child's cry through love...

don't walk away lonely

for time is dead

and it's clear oozing blood

lies stagnant upon

your fingertips

let the truth burn itís ageless

depressions - deep into your night

yet walk again within

the air

as within you cries an eternal light

- jude

creating rainbows

a lady dreams in blue

a lady dreams through the


that fall,

in showers

about the season

that is she

trying, screaming - crying

with love - - -

on frozen rivers

of mountains tall

in trying to carve

a secondís truth,

a woman - with a childís hold

on white

watches - a blind world

lying - to read

those eternal-through



that is she!

to write. . .

- - -

and then falls

as their hold


with the coming of

a dayís light

let's continue moving,

sounding pictures - a she reflection

eternally - new,

and follow time

just beyond itís life -

clouded to remain free

yearfully - deeply tearfully,


that if she can retain

& be,

someone if looking

can see -


it is on an ocean's front

where only she stands,

truly naked - she is

alone -

no need of mirrors to teach her love,

she belongs without convincing

yet ...

though the ocean is free in its

listening hold

and its waters - are always moving,

are always one,

itís touch

must eventually - drown a soul

whose birth is warmth

within - cold

yea, moving along shall

the lady

for her breath, must breathe

of the warmth it is

i have seen a woman

creating rainbows

i have found her line,

resting restless

yearning for an oceanís grace,

within these

beyond-time , color-shades

if only someone sees ,

above the trees ,

but once

we cry...

we try!

- jude





lady is sewn (home without a window)

the lady takes a sound,

and dreams asleep

upon the ground,

while winter skies,

laugh in tears

that hide her from her

dying years -

and morning falls slowly,

over gardens - yet unburdened,

striking rainbows

into dust -

as mountains into rust -

still - she rises to the drink

of reflections reflecting sunbeams -

tying her hair open

with wistful wind streams -

she's a tree's growing rhythm

weaving grass within her fingers

she's a snowball, glacier ridden,

melting between the shadows

she's today -

her hands - are lonely ribbons

forming bows never given

as her eyes are a tired

child -

receiving without - belonging -

sheís alone -

"i know i'm a woman

that my breasts need the giving

and my child never born,

cries myself to be torn,

into living ..."

in her only wooden castle,

does she ride the foaming river

leading days into shadows

must she roam

and i'm the man who met


her - watched her closing

watched her passing -

it's her day!

come dance with me - young lady

in your home without a window

as i lean against your

door -

i learn on your soul to ride -

and she rests within my shadow

as she dries her hair upon my skin

in a skinís thought of touch

our fingers learn to swim

from stare beyond the sun

do the fields learn to hum -

in learning for her winter

i'm a flame within her sun

and a child turns awake

as together do we stake

ourselves - to be

but morning wakes the flowers

and with tomorrow dies the hours -

she turned toward a

mountain and was gone!

on lonely wooden shoulders

i watch a river passing

and for this woman who is older -

i know

- - -

soaking in the tears - i go ...

in her only wooden castle

does she ride the foaming river

leading days into shadows

must she roam!

- jude





father dream .!.

fill me . . . ,

if i find

as do i hold,

a childís rhyme,

tired fingers running slow

deep within my arms

she'll grow

(but yea, fantasies in love

listen eternally and now,

and though i'm not!

i must be - that i am forever

until i know she has -


oh! child young breathing


ever need me - ever so.

i'm listening,

as you grow . . .

- jude




just children ?

who is she, a strange lady

within her tree

if wondering

on where's when

can, she...

stream air waves

into color

upon that only


dualities - but who

one through four,

i'm growing older

in this door,

just children upon the floor

just children - asking for more


- jude




a child of birth

in love... !

of pictures real,

you can never steal,

oh! of that time gap

within the what

that is real

and the where, your care

determines you feel

but rhythm can too often

drown in rhyme

how hard!? when you find out


mother time -

never bore her

children into birth

but is a creature of

the inverse upon the realm

of human association-logic,

so trains,

those who succeed

to forget

to carry them

does she care - through a

birth of her own perversion

a birth i have seen as


and uncaring "through her

silent web"

she voids them out

and i have seen her children

blind - cringing before her

womb -

wallowing before her


and my only woman

i would die!

that she might complete

to become a child -

not of time



a child of birth

that she may burst free

from the womb of time

into the womb of

of she -

(of i )

that she may reach through

birth -

finding life

not death;

in love,

- - -

for she is

"a child of birth"

- jude




waiting, as a child upon the sea

but try the wind,

it waits to be caught by

only fingers,

to be warmed by

hands unclasped,

waiting as a child upon the sea,

don't try, just be the sky

and you'll be caught

as the wind,

you'll never begin,

you'll never end,

and you learn

of when you bend ...

you need never

move -

my woman ?;

as a lake - is she seen

am i perched upon the sky,

catching the sun,

in streams, bursting off

a waterís caressed


while listening to the wind

carry itís tune,

and dance your

melodies back upon

to the me,

i will carry night back away,

painting; - sun-time-colors

your rhyme into

a rhythm,

who knows the climb,

upon the chimes,

of the windís time

eternally might we - spend a second

upon the sea - upon the wind

who am i ... , with thee

- jude




mellow swirls

untouching do we appear

to the eyes of any state-frozen


though - she stands here

near all-touching with me,

wind fingers, born of her breathing


i do feel

holding mine

in a seeing care

for the - we

who is there ...

her eyes are mine

and together we see

mellow swirls

of color yearning no more

is the mold of

two shades forming one solid -

as i am her -

she is i -

and upon the

solidity of we -

we need not time

as eternity

of our reflection to see -

in a warmth, non-relative

beyond our sphere find

we are now -

two fingered hands


in ...

within love!

- jude




greeting water, i now know as air ...

take me off the road

release me from my


to grasp a grain of sand,

reflect reflections

just to try a little


just trying for a ride,

with their going

always coming

on a road of anywhere

in a home of anyplace

on nowhere standing

am i ...

but i heard, one day,

a painting, nailed face

upon a treeís skin

into shape, i took a swim

pecking - heckling -

they're carving their initials upon

the frame

hearing not the picture

just dreaming,

personal yearnings - against a non-reflective

a non-absorbing


trying - in their lying rhyme

to hitch a ride

upon a solidity

they refuse to feel

they refuse to peal through

into color

for they are children,

for they are fear -

"give me cloudy toys,"

watching them play

those girls & boys

met her today while molding


in clay

and without dreaming she

came to stay

as through the streaks

of sun - & - rain

across the burning field

of a touches pain

i found her features

carved -in wooden free

her eternal lines

have joined with the present,


every place,

that is i

- jude





loose and rambling across

the sky directional,

and no reason why.

- jude

coloring silhouettes ; dancing together

holding still the morning,

i wander -

speaking to clouds i know -

there is a woman

of warmth , a-touching

probing my skin

she's letting me grow

breaking angles into lines

churning pollen

into time

and reaching into me,

i hear dreaming

which has woken

against fantasies, just


so, our sky colors

will speak open

of we

just knowing how to be

just to be ...

holding still the evening,

in silence

living all my cares

& wantings,

i hold with my lady;

circles of fire

retiring lights,

coloring silhouettes

dancing together,

do we slowly,

churn - movement

into sleep

a wakeless retreat

natural in sharing

as is the pairing

natural in sharing

as is the pairing

of we ...

- jude




found myself smiling - today; ...

found myself smiling -


as i found my love reaching,

breathing beyond my

skin hints of you

remember when they spoke of bells -


the swells of your eternal

tide -

find, myself as i do ride

within the - with-

of you -

hearing clear -

no sounds - but the

silent echoing -

of we ...

- jude




more then rhyme ...

follow me down,

hold me warm,

catch my pieces,

when they flake

if i'm torn -

born to the sky

i'm in love with

your earth,

alone, i've cared to

die -

with you, i've breathed in of


someone painted a pattern

timed across the why,

and neck strings

ordering reasons

for the existence of

the sky -

a man touches

a woman,

alone within the night

of warmth - friction that

is rhythm, drips rainbows

to clasped hands

open for sight

there is a belonging,

that is private, owing to no


of anyone's sight,

yet still they paint on walls

and whisper between the

night -

securing themselves within the


of their crying - society's


but when they speak of

white - where is

itís essence,


its essence is

color -

and in all it's pure -

so scream at me,

i'll listen no more -

i have swallowed

the rainbows of my own making

and my breath being

all color

shores free -

in a oneness -

in touches of white -

there is purity -

hands woven within

eternity - warmed by only love -

are the only hands


from the politics

of time

and within our rhythm,

we are more then


but it's a verse

newly written

not for the world

but just for we,

for it's a truth

for they're in fear

something as solid

as we

will shake their year

but i no longer listen -

though i still hear our birth is eternal

not tied to

their fear -

- jude




across an amber sky . . . it was dusk

and oh! - - -

across an amber sky

we made love,

till - this child

knew to fly

it was dusk as we

found our string

a windís quiet motion

clinging to a skyís freedom

it was dusk as she

was sparked by our

movement through touch,

to release herself

into -through


and became of birth

and she'll learn to

word her freedom in

letters of her own making -

through colors of

her fingers - feeling


- - -


and given into life

fingers untied


in singing she'll be free ...

our amber-dusk -

- jude




still - what !

where are we

where do we die

are we to be;

spiral dreams

always moving

but always

apart from that central


winter walls

too often building

up before the calls

dropping sound upon

the ground

within its own care

to move -

lying bodies, row upon row

sipping of life


- jude




funny waters

yea, funny waters -

just - the line

in my funny life

with bars, under breath control?

breathing in;

breathing out,

just listening for a moment

and i'm drowning from

air stagnation -

timeís clutching feel -

is everywhere about


drawing , people -

their pictures thick

and tall -

if the spring doesn't bend -

the mountain shall never

fall ?




time -

glaciers are carving an

ogreís table,

out of earthís breathing line

little do they ever think to know

their world shall never grow

for dust shall crumble

into dust

and between the waiting all shall

continually rust

that again still they may begin

that again still they may end

i'll call their fall

and raise my eyes

to seed the rumbling without


until the rise - does clear for sight


i'm a breathing light

just before

the mountain falls

and black

is night

this silly life, that is mine

but to continue to find

- - -

- jude



what, is a mirror . . . ?

is it a thunderís rain

drowning out the flowers,

pouring through the hours


hammers against these walls,

this tower

no longer that eternal height

- ! - ! -


in the beginning;

we were lost beyond the

haze - of air everyday


in the end;

time refutes our

dreams - and paints our reality

ever - below - a skyís -

churning rhyme - of

milk - light - feeding the blind -

in the now;

before is after

and tomorrow is but a pillow

in yesterday

come our silver ship

evolve throughout

this trip

yes - your planets are

mere points below an


and the inter-relation -

the whispers - they are the

unseen cracks - within

the false uniformity of

our universe -

and beyond the cracks -

there is no time -

there is but a mirror!

what? . . is a mirror ? . .

- jude




from where does the wind flow

through the agony of


many worlds

will the current flow

with candles,

losing their flame in death,

with candles,

burning eternally, within the line

and death

it is partners

when time will halt

eternity offers you itís wings

if anything anywhere

sings -

and time, and time but


as the waves never stop

washing over,

for - death is but a fantasy

waiting yet never here -

and open eyes beyond the fear

do hear the breath of life

within oneís own


and the skin never stops

hearing through

but from where

does the wind

flow -

- jude




and castles grow within her hand

born, just beyond

where a line


born, all within;

and are holds

a womb expands

till itís walls, are walled of


born is a child seen,

caught - by olden arms

drinking anew -

she's a birthday child

scrambling round - she is


and the mirrors within herself

are seen,

speaking ;

drawing pictures from the

sand -

castles grow within her


coloring pages in the rain

will she laugh

and color into color,

the stain ?

candy pictures if you please

a child is filled with

an insistent greed for,

life -

yes, and castles grow within

her hand

- jude




its solidity is the erratic fall of a moment eternal

my child small,

is reaching tall

and those faces

keep stepping down

upon her, my hands -

yet - she is a breath of water

running untimed between

my breathís


standing there

more then believing

knowing of the chimes

echoing their color

off - through

all stars -

of where in the waiting lies birth

is freedom

in tears; in breath - we carry our children

- jude




reverse cries - for the laugh ?

so cries the wind - burn

peering from itís unseen perch

upon the faces of those

all those

who sleep with the

night -

held warm am i,

as those howling skies

make their flight

beyond - across my sight

as i gaze through this glass -

that thinks me free -

i want to reach out - forward

into the beyond

but yea -

so easy is it to

forget - what has yet to pass

who is this caricatured


roped into time

allowed but the reflection

illusion sight of

eternityís rhyme

beyond - do i cry - - -

and yea -

beyond nature;

i do - dare to fly

silent words as flickering birds

within a sunlight -

am i but learning

- in -

just how to die -

- jude





gazing through my window -

out across the

rain -

catching memories of

tomorrow -

and i'm signing my name -

sky writer - just ignoring clouds

as you fly

carrying your dreams real


you've -

carried them from birth -

nurturing them - silently

into time -

unbidden before any voices -

their fingers are lines -

with a sight strength -

found of a heart -

whose beat -


out through eternity

and there we

met, ringed together

- jude


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